I would like to share with you all an issue that I never had prior to having children but has become an integral part of my public life now. Strangers. Specifically old strangers. You know how our parents all told us not to talk to strangers when we were kids? Why doesn't that translate to adulthood also?Allow me to disclose some background information to my newly attained social enigma.
My babies have pretty much made their first transformation from baby to toddler (one's fully transformed into toddler mode, while the other has a few more months in baby form). This makes going anywhere in public a logistical nightmare. Taking monsters into public places is difficult enough on its own, but then you get the looks. From everybody. Approving looks and random calls of "aw how cute" whenever they're behaving; looks of disdain and exasperation when they're not. Looks I expect. What I don't need are the random comments of "looks like you've got your hands full", or giving unnecessary commentary like "aw he looks hungry", "poor grumpy little guy. do you want ___". (Side note: one or both of my daughters gets called a boy literally every single time we go anywhere. That doesn't bother me really, but I find it weird how people genderize everything, even as infants).
Since this whole going out in public thing doesn't work out well a good deal of the time, my partner and I rarely go out to eat anymore unless it's fast food or take out.So I snack at home. I snack at school. I hide food in my room so I don't have to share my good snacks. On the bright side, I've gotten really good at eating with one hand.
Bobby Singer, Supernatural
Bobby Singer, Supernatural
Sorry for the baby rant, guys. It's been a long week and I didn't want to write about school. Or politics. Or the Super Bowl. See you guys on Wednesday. I'll bring the snacks!
No need to apologize for the rant! It's eye-opening to see into the mind and frustrations of a parent of two babies/toddlers. I totally sympathize with how obnoxious the comments from people in public are. I loathe talking to strangers in public, so it must be so irritating having that happen so much more often. I don't have kids, but I am constantly reminded about how having kids is incredibly exhausting by my coworkers. But they also always talk about how rewarding it is as well. It is still so hard for me to understand how those two things are simultaneous. How can I be so annoyed and so in love at the same time? I guess only parents can understand. :)
ReplyDeleteHi Rachel!
ReplyDeleteI had to comment on yours because I love your voice in your writing; I can actually hear you talking aloud because it's so similar to how you speak in person - which I think is awesome.
As for the strangers commenting on your kids, I could only imagine how annoying that is. I'm kidless at the moment (thank God because imagine me as a mom - yikes), but I know if I was a mom, and a stranger made a comment about my kids, I'd be less than kind. I don't think anyone has any business commenting on your parenting, but what do I know?
Also, looking forward to those snacks tomorrow lmfao.
- Kayla
I understand this all too well. Luckily, after a while it becomes automatic to just smile/respond/move on. Until your kids get a bit older and then people find it appropriate to start conversations with the kids instead of you. That is a bit odd in itself. Then it's like... why exactly are they sparking up dialogue with a little kid?
ReplyDeleteRachel, as you know I don't have kids, but I observe this all the time when I am at work. I can't help but think "when has anyone ever said that is appropriate behavior towards kids or their parents?" I feel sometimes though that once people have attained a certain age they feel they have the right to make comments like that.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I agree with Kayla in that you write just like you speak and I can clearly hear your voice as I read this!
I find random strangers talking to me all the time. I don't know if it is my look or what, but I find that what you are talking about started when I was pregnant and then didn't stop. My child was called a boy for most of her toddlerhood because she was bald and her dad dressed her each day in "boy colors" people might say. This happened for a fairly long time until she refused to wear pants. Parenting is tough! Thanks for the snacks.
ReplyDeleteI find random strangers talking to me all the time. I don't know if it is my look or what, but I find that what you are talking about started when I was pregnant and then didn't stop. My child was called a boy for most of her toddlerhood because she was bald and her dad dressed her each day in "boy colors" people might say. This happened for a fairly long time until she refused to wear pants. Parenting is tough! Thanks for the snacks.
ReplyDelete